With Edmond Lau and Elenna Mosoff
November 28th, 2018 in San Francisco, CA
For those who want a powerful edge in their leadership — one that lets them notice when, where, and how they're hesitating; acknowledge their inner workings for what they are; and then take charge of how they want to be in the world.
“A duo capable of bending, stretching and expanding how understand ourselves and our lived leadership. Elenna and Edmond bring unparalleled depth, courage and spark to their work and to the world.”
“Imagine being on a leadership journey where you have a safe place to explore the edges of your leadership with thoughtfulness, care, and some no nonsense kickassery. That is what you will experience (and everything in between) when trusting your authentic discovery of your leadership to Edmond and Elenna. “Wow”, “More please”, “Best thing ever” are words that aptly describe what you will experience. They know what it takes to guide you on your journey. You are definitely in good hands and, more importantly you are in good hearts.”
Hi! I'm Edmond Lau. I'm the author of The Effective Engineer and a co-founder of Co Leadership. I've been building and leading teams across Silicon Valley at Google, Quora, Quip, and Ooyala for over a decade.
The first time I became a tech lead, I remember feeling lost.
The confidence I had felt while writing code had wilted away now that I was running a team.
We were nearing the deadline for an urgent and important project for the company. I felt completely overwhelmed and didn't know what to do.
I didn't know how to lead people on my team — especially those with more industry experience than me — and get them to take ownership of shared responsibilities.
I didn't know how to juggle my own work with all the project coordination and long-term planning that needed to happen.
I didn't know how or when to push back and would instinctively say yes to prove that I could be a leader — and I would commit myself to stressful situations.
I didn't know how to mentor my teammates or contribute to planning or review meetings unless I found the time to learn and understand everything — and I just didn't have the time.
I felt like I was just winging it.
And so, I just worked harder, pulling 70-80 hour weeks, trying to get everything done.
And it still wasn't enough. We were going to miss the deadline — by a lot.
I kept thinking, “I'm doing a terrible job. Who am I to be a leader? Maybe I'm not ready. Maybe I'm not qualified and don't deserve my leadership position.”
I kept waiting for my manager to ask me, “How'd you let this happen? What happened to the plan? Why didn't you foresee this and work around it?”
The more I worried, the more I would freeze up. Things felt stuck. They weren't clicking.
It took me years later to realize that the imposter syndrome I felt was a widespread phenomena in the tech industry — that I wasn't the only one feeling anxious that I was winging it.
When we experience imposter syndrome, we doubt our own accomplishments and believe that our success so far has been due to luck. And we fear that we'll be exposed for the frauds that we are.
The imposter voice isn't the only one that shakes our confidence.
Sometimes, it's a comparison voice that keeps saying your technical skills or leadership skills aren't as good as that other engineer or manager — and so you question whether you're qualified and feel like you're never good enough.
Or it's a critical voice that keeps pointing out everything that you're doing wrong — and so you're constantly in a state of anxiety and miss out on the joy of celebrating what's going well.
Or it's the humble voice that tells you that sharing something you're proud of would leave people thinking you're arrogant and self-centered — and so you rarely share your accomplishments, and people don't give you the recognition you deserve.
Or the servant voice that says to be a good leader, you have to be a sh*t umbrella and protect your team — and so you end up self-sacrificing your own happiness and nearly burn out.
Or the uptight voice that says you need to quality control everything — and so you never trust people on your team to get things done and end up working later hours to get things done on your own.
If you have these thoughts and voices, you're not alone.
You try ignoring the inner voices and the doubt and try just pumping yourself up when you're worried, hoping that the voices will go away. But they don't.
You hear advice of “Just fake it until you make it.” But the idea of pretending, of being someone you're not, feels inauthentic. When you try it, you worry even more about being exposed for a fraud.
You try to get other people to validate and compliment how good you are — if only the impact of those comments could last, but instead the extra boost in confidence is momentary and fleeting.
But ultimately, all this thinking and trying leave you exhausted and going nowhere.
You consider giving up and just accepting that the thoughts of imposter syndrome, of self-sacrifice, of not wanting to shine too brightly, are just thoughts you have to tolerate.
I used to think that, too.
It took me years of intense, inner work and interviews and coaching conversations with hundreds of engineers and leaders to discover something:
We all have inner voices that hold us back from the leader we want to be and the impact we want to have:
I'm not good enough.
I'm doing a terrible job.
I don't deserve my promotion or my job offer.
I'm just winging it.
I can't ask for what I want.
When we ignore our inner voices, they can have power over us. They shape and influence our behavior and our thoughts.
It takes courage to examine those voices. It's only when we dig deep into what the inner voices are saying, and why they're saying what they're saying — can we shrink the voices that hold us back.
And, in courageously exploring those voices, we'll also discover that we all have inner voices that support us, though sometimes they can be a little quiet.
Voices that say:
I've done something like this before.
I'm not faking anything.
I deserve my success.
I can prioritize my own happiness.
I want to play big.
When we can turn up the volume on these supporting voices and let them take up more space in our heads, we start coming at the things in our day-to-day with clarity we can trust and free of doubt.
This powerful process is called Reprogramming Yourself.
Reprogramming yourself lets you find a more authentic way of leading. It amplifies the best parts of you and empowers you to do the things you want to do.
And through all my work in developing and coaching engineering leaders, what I've realized is this:
We spend all this time programming software and products, but we don't spend nearly enough time noticing our own programming and changing it to better align with what we want.
And now, I've partnered with one of the most creative people I know — leadership and adventure coach, Elenna Mosoff — to share with you the keys on how to explore and master your inner voices in this one-day immersive leadership experience.
Together, we've coached and helped hundreds of people — engineers, tech leads, product managers, directors, and more — transform their mindsets. And in this leadership experience, you'll get access to two experienced coaches and a group of peers in a facilitated space, who can witness and support that transformation in you.
Imagine if you could go from a mindset of “If I don't do it, it will never get done” to “The people around me are creative and resourceful who I can learn to trust.” You'd have so much more time, freedom, and energy to take on those exciting and fun projects you've put off for so long.
Imagine if you could go from “Why are all these bad things happening to me?” to “I will spend my energy on the things that I can influence.” You'd shift from feeling like a victim to feeling empowered to take ownership to get exactly what you want — whether it's that leadership position, that promotion, or that job offer.
Imagine if you could go form “By sharing an accomplishment, people will see me as arrogant” to “Sharing will inspire people around me and create more connection.” You'd feel seen for your successes and motivated to play bigger.
When you reprogram your inner workings, you stop second guessing yourself. And you lead with confidence and clarity you can trust.
“Elenna and Edmond are the most dynamic duo I’ve ever met. I’ve seen the two of them bring large groups up to sparkling heights, then back to earth safe and sound. The differences between Edmond and Elenna creates room for everyone to be as they are. The deep trust and respect they have for each other sets a tone that fast forwards everyone to the edges of their comfort zones, then makes it safe to take that one step beyond into something new. If you’re looking to expand your range, this experience is for you.”
“You’ve been on roller coasters before, but not like this. What’s unique about Elenna and Edmond's style is their creative genius. With Elenna’s theater background combined with Edmond’s technical prowess, you are guaranteed to have an experience that will amplify your growth unlike any other you’ve had before. You will find yourself challenged to use all your intellect and to tune your existing senses. Be prepared to be taken to new limits and explore uncharted territories.”
“Elenna and Edmond are a powerful mix of eccentric, magical, and deep human beings that can transform wackiness into deep insights and a-ha moments and curiosity into playful learning. They will allow you to learn by failing, transforming the concept of failure as something that is wrong or bad into something you need in order to grow and succeed. Both of them take personal growth very VERY seriously. And are not afraid of leaving the comfort zone, of exploring beyond limits. They will always encourage others to embrace their whole amazing selves.”
During this 1-day immersive, leadership experience, you'll courageously shrink the inner imposter voices that have power over your life and work. You'll amplify the powerful voices that you want to play a bigger role in your life and head in the direction you most want.
“LIFE CHANGING LEADERS! Edmond & Elenna create a palpable magic that’s inspired so many of us to stretch into better versions of ourselves. Their extraordinary co-leading partnership manifests from their exuberant zest for life, brilliant smarts, and commitment to living with unadulterated authenticity. They will EXCEED YOUR EXPECTATIONS because of what they co-create beyond the unimaginable!”
“Edmond and Elenna's combined experience provides a balance of right-brain and left-brain that create an in-depth exploration of individuals' awareness and enhance a team's growth.”
“The co-leadership experienced between Edmond and Elenna is best described as magic! A unique combination of style, experience, and talent, Edmond and Elenna do a beautiful job of ‘holding space’ for workshop participants, and do so in a creative, brilliant way. They have the natural leadership ability to dance with whatever shows up, while still pointing to (and keeping) an agenda that meets the desired impact intended. A powerful space to play for all audience members!”
with Edmond Lau & Elenna Mosoff
For engineers, managers, product managers, and other people in tech.
San Francisco: November 28th, 2018 - 9:30AM - 5:00PM
$997 per attendee.
Even as an individual contributor, you're still working as part of a team, organization, or shared mission. And anytime you notice a gap of something that could be better, there is an opportunity to take initiative and to lead.
You learn leadership by leading, even when it's informal and without authority. In fact, most companies look for people who are already performing at the next level when it comes time for performance reviews and promotions. This leadership experience will give you the foundations to accelerate the growth of your leadership skills.
Do both! There are many great leadership books out there — we've read lots — and they are useful for wrapping your head around how something should work theoretically. But we're sure you also remember reading books, thinking “This sounds useful,” only to never use the material again.
We focus on creating experiential programs because decades of research in learning have shown that the learning sticks best when you experience it. This is especially true when you experience the learning in a supportive environment where everyone else is practicing and reinforcing the learnings as well. And given limited time, why not invest in the learning that actually sticks?
We've been running workshops for hundreds of engineering leaders across the industry, and we hear this a lot. The feeling of your situation being unique is real — and indeed people's situations are different. But you'd also be surprised how many pervasive themes there are throughout the industry.
This limiting belief that no one else shares your situation is also incredibly isolating. It makes it harder to ask for help if you don't feel like anyone understands what you're going through. Many people struggle with imposter syndrome, not feeling good enough, not knowing whether they're doing a good job, in some shape or form. We've crafted this experience to have multiple layers of learnings so that it is extremely applicable to any leader in tech.
Because this is a leadership development experience, you can leverage your education budget if you have one.
One of the most valuable skills we can develop is advocating for ourselves. The most important thing is to ask. Show them this page. They can say no, there's no budget, but then they know you're interested in leadership training, and that may open up other possibilities and opportunities. Start the conversation with what you're hoping to get out of it that would be good for your team or company: “I'm looking to develop skills to have a greater impact on the company,” or “I want to learn how to more effectively and creatively work with my peers across the company so that we can make decisions faster.”
One hard lesson we've learned is that if you keep doing the things you're doing, the best outcome is that you'll just get better at doing those same things. To truly accelerate your growth, you need to break out of your default pattern and invest in an immersive experience that shifts you into a different trajectory. We've designed our leadership experience to provide a step function in your growth.
Your company might already have some policy for employees to attend conferences. Reprogramming Yourself is not a conference by any traditional sense of the word, but it is a gathering for you to experience transformational growth. Wouldn't making a request to come be a great first move towards fulfilling the courageous leader you're trying to grow?
That's true! But your time is valuable. Why not attend the leadership experience that makes the best use of your time? We are trained leadership coaches and have experience running leadership events for people ranging from companies like Google, Quip, Dropbox, Salesforce, NASA, Autodesk, and more.
We'll have breaks and unstructured rest time. But out of respect for other participants, the rest of the programming for the days is a phone-free and laptop-free experience.
We'll be sad not to see you there, but you can give your ticket to another friend.
This will certainly be the last time we run this event this year, and we can't make any promises about whether we'll run it again.
“In my 30 years in the health care field, I have been fortunate to experience the unique abilities of Elenna and Edmond, as they transform individuals and groups to realize their power from within, their ability to connect deeper with themselves and with others, and to ultimately drive value for organizations. Their skillsets lie not in simply teaching a curriculum but creating an environment and mindset that enables people to authentically lead with intention, and through awareness of both self and others. You need to experience these incredible leaders!”